I feel caught between two worlds. The world of the blunt, harshness that was the only thing I knew growing up. And this new world of gentle tenderness that so many need. As I try to find where I fit into it, gratitude is teaching me how to maneuver this new way of life.
What is Gratitude?
According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, “gratitude is the state of being grateful: thankfulness.” So, I spend time going over the things I’m thankful for. My kids, Kim, my home, our dogs, our things, we have food; the list goes on and on. But these all feel so cliché and so I keep searching for deeper gratitude. How can I bring this state of thankfulness into a new way of living. How can I be thankful all the time, even when things are tough and in discord?
For those of you that do not know, earlier this year I lost my job. They moved the position to the divisional/corporate level. During a time like that, the struggle is keeping the darkness of depression at bay. I didn’t just lose my income and my place of work; I lost a second family and a group of friends I held dear in my heart. Everyone says they’ll stay in touch, but honestly, it’s not easy in those situations. I don’t begrudge any of them and I hope they are doing well. But how can I find gratitude in that situation?
Well, it opened up my time, and I was able to get this website up and running. Kim and I had been working on it for a while, but we finally were able to get it going. But that seemed like such a small amount of thankfulness to offset the hurt and loss I was feeling. So, I searched deeper.
How to do Gratitude.
I began listing 5 things I was grateful for every day. I made sure it wasn’t the same 5 things every morning; and added things I didn’t feel thankful for but knew I should be grateful for. Kind of a way to trick my brain into feeling more gratitude, especially concerning things that were difficult.
During this time, I would also listen to classes on mindvalley.com – a website full of classes to make us better at the areas of our life that aren’t taught in schools or by our parents. They have classes on mind, body, soul, entrepreneurship, career, love life, and relationships. (If you check them, I have no affiliation with them. I mention them only because these classes have helped me.)
During one of the courses, Vishen – the founder of mindvalley.com – said to find something about yourself that you are grateful for. Start naming, each day, something about yourself that you did good. And so, I implemented this into my daily life. Every day, I spend some time reminding myself that I have a lot of gratitude. It still didn’t feel like it offset the hurt and discord I felt.
So, now I’m adding another step. Because you see this life isn’t about getting everything right the first time. This life isn’t about being perfect at anything. It is about doing the best you can, learning from your mistakes and doing the right things again and not doing the things that didn’t work. This next level step changes me on a spiritual level.
As I list each item on my list, I allow the emotion I feel to come forth as I say it. For example, I say I have gratitude for my daughter. Then, I think of how that gratefulness makes me feel, how proud of her I am, and how lucky I am to have her in my life. I let that emotion simmer in me and let it spread. Why? Because our memories are tied to our emotions, as is our vibrations and our way of life. These emotions flowing help keep me in the state of gratitude, a new way of life.
When should we have gratitude?
Well, I think you already know my answer to this question. We should always be grateful. Every day, we should find things to be thankful for. But doing it just once a day isn’t always enough. Sometimes, we have to stop our negative flows and start listing items.
Yesterday, I was struggling. Negative thoughts kept flowing in and all I could see was that I’d been without a job for 3 months and no closer to having any income. I felt worthless and wanted to give up and just accept that maybe I really couldn’t make a business for myself. I started venting to Kim and she listened patiently. She pointed out that we both go through moments like this and that she wasn’t really sure how to pull me out. I thought about what I would say to myself. Then, I said, “Kim, let’s name all the good things that we have going for us right now.”
The negativity stopped and we moved forward. And we were able to see what needed to be done next. Gratitude moved us to a new way of living.
Why is gratitude important?
Gratitude is our mechanism to combat negativity and discord. It keeps us moving forward and not stuck in the past. According to the classes I’ve taken on mindvalley.com, it also brings us to a state of happiness. Not just a brief moment of happiness, but an overall feeling of joy.
As I sit here typing this, I feel grateful for everyone that reads our blog. I feel joy that we are able to share our lives with each of you. And I hope that it touches your enough to be thankful to be a part of our journey.
Conclusion
If you have read any of our other blogs, you know that we see life as a journey with ups and downs, blessings and lessons, a path to betterment. I do not have all the answers and the greatest gratitude I have for myself is that I want to learn more and more and more. I am always learning something new. I invite you to subscribe to our blog so you can follow our journey. I hope that something we say or a lesson we experience helps you in your life. And feel free to leave comments because we can learn from you too. That is the whole point of our journey together. We get the pleasure of helping each other out.
May you always find blessings and hold gratitude in your heart.
